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[1, 2, 3]
Reading Female Signals
Chapter 2
Once you have determined that this initial non-verbal communication
has been successful, you have to make the next move, although (ideally)
she may surprise you and make it first. This is the moment we all
have trouble with… crossing the gulf between yourself and the
woman in whom you are interested. Here are a few tips on how to
best accomplish this in the most common of scenarios: the bar. Of
course you can ask the woman you are interested in to dance, but
this is often not an effective way to determine her receptiveness
to your advances as most women will accept, regardless of their
level of interest. It is almost always better to ask a woman to
dance after you have gotten to know her a little, should
the situation permit. If the place is crowded (and hopefully not
too noisy) and people have to approach the bartender to obtain a
drink, you may want to position yourself such that she must approach
your location when she orders her next beverage. Women aren't stupid,
they'll see you there and take the bait if they are interested.
When she approaches, you have many options, but which you choose
at this point will determine your chances for success. If you hand
her a cheesy line, you'll probably find (unless she's a cheesy woman)
you'll crash and burn. Here's something you can try: if she's wearing
something of interest, comment on it... as long as it will allow
for a conversational segue. An example of this happened to me just
yesterday. A woman approached me at the bar who was wearing a hat
with the Gibson guitar company logo on it. I began with "Cool
hat." She smiled and said "thanks", to which I responded
"do you play guitar?" This opened things up and gave her
an excuse to remain and continue the conversation instead of feeling
awkward about some compliment from a total stranger. Make certain
you have something to talk about - what ever the topic, which will
let her know you are interested in her but not seem like a psycho
stalker or bumbling idiot. Make sure the subject matter is of sufficient
merit to continue the conversation beyond the first minute. Saying
"hi there" without having something else to follow with
will be met with a "hi", an awkward silence, and a hasty
retreat by the female in question. Be casual… but not indifferent.
While you don't want to scare her off with overt enthusiasm at the
outset, you want to ensure that she knows you're not talking to
her for the good of your health either. As your conversation progresses
it's time to start looking for more signals:
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You will notice that as interest increases your body positions
will gradually shift from a "V" shape with your shoulders
facing outward from each other at a 45 degree angle from the
bar to a direct face-to-face stance with your shoulders parallel.
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As the conversation continues, you will be able to further
gauge interest by noticing whether she leans in toward you and
or not and her hand gestures are predominately made with her
palms open and facing upward. These are often clear indications
of openness to your attentions. Interested women will additionally
often idly play with their hair, jewelry, drinking glass or
other inanimate object within their reach while they are speaking
to you. If this is the case, you may find you will soon be moving
to the next stage:
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