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Manual Sex Manual

So you want to be a lean, mean, sex machine. Well that's all well and good, but before you get too far, just remember that certain things in life are just better when done lovingly by hand - and sex is no exception. Many women prefer manual stimulation above any other kind, and most enjoy it at least as well as anything else when it is done just right. But men don't always spend enough time with manual stimulation, and therefore are missing some of the best sex they can share with their partners.

The essential component to good manual sex, coincidentally, is the same as other great sex, namely communication. I'm not saying that every time we have sex with someone there needs to be a briefing session. In fact a de-briefing is usually more important first, pun intended. Communication occurs on many subtle levels, and we can be engaged in a non-verbal dialogue by simply remaining alert to the signals our lover gives us about their level of comfort and pleasure.

Needless to say, any sexual act involving genital contact is an intimate experience requiring a level of trust and comfort between partners. Suffice to say that it is not necessarily first date material. Most women need to have a fairly high level of trust and comfort with a man before they can enjoy the sensation of being so intimately explored by someone.

When really intimate kissing and fondling have aroused her to a level that she feels ready for this activity, she will let you know in subtle but unmistakable ways. Of course, it is always possible to misinterpret these signals if you are new to each other, and it should go without saying that if she should indicate that she prefers not to proceed, you must always respect her right to choose for herself what she is comfortable with. It may or may not result in a verbal communication, but either way, it is always good form to remain relaxed, reassuring her that you understand, and can wait for her. Pressure to do something we aren't ready for is never conducive to good sex.

While your hands explore each other's bodies, you might run your hand up her legs and eventually light briefly between them, applying gentle, but not urgent pressure there, and then moving down her legs again. If she responds by eventually pushing back against your hand, or opening her legs to your touch, that is a sign that she is comfortable with what you are doing . At this point, don't be in a hurry to get her pants undone. Let her wait a bit. You may find that she initiates the next step on her own, and this is a very good sign. As the sacred sex teachings of Hindu Tantra have prescribed for over 2000 years, pleasure is enhanced greatly when gratification is delayed or deferred.

Eventually some or all clothing restrictions can be removed affording the opportunity to focus all of your manual dexterity to her advantage. Slow down here again. Don't be so anxious to just barge right in there. Make her wait. Spend lots of time touching her external genitalia in varied ways, and with varied rhythms. Be alert for signs that something you do is especially pleasing to her, or not. But remember that anything done repetitiously will become irritating eventually.

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