Getting That First Kiss
Scenario 4: You can't deal with taking the risk of choosing the
wrong scenario, so you just outright ask her if you can kiss her.
This can be a dicey situation, because she will be relieved if she
didn't want to, but if she did want to, you will be either considered
to be a gentleman, or a complete dork. Your chances of a second
date are 50/50. A potential remedy to this situation is not to ask
but to tell. Say "I really would love to kiss you right now!"
and begin moving in slowly until you get a reaction. If she moves
toward you - you're in, if she reacts negatively, you can smile
and say "clearly you'd rather I didn't though" and end
the date. No damage done.
Scenario 5: You want to kiss her, and you think that she wants
to kiss you, so you kiss her. You both had a great time and want
to see each other again, so everybody's happy. You go out on more
dates. Obviously ideal.
Scenario 6: You are uncertain of how things went and her opinion
of you. Maybe things were a little awkward or she is shy. Don't
go for the kiss right away - ask for a hug. Very few people will
refuse a hug unless they despise you which you will discover immediately
upon this occurrence. Hug the person firmly but tenderly and then
as you finish draw away but still keep your arms around them and
smile while looking into their eyes. If they pull away, let them
go, but if they close their eyes, look down at your mouth or move
toward you, it's time to kiss!
Scenario 7: You don't want to kiss her, but you think that she
wants to kiss you, so you kiss her. She is happy that you kissed
her and takes this to mean that you will go out with her again soon
for many more nights of kissing that you don't really want. Ever
seen fatal attraction? You're not doing either of you any favors!
Go with your gut.
Did you make the right decision? Kissing is such a simple thing,
why does initiating it have to be so complicated? Even the most
knowledgeable ladies man needs some kind of sign or signal. There
are some definite non verbal indications that a woman wants you
to kiss her. Look for the following behaviors to help you figure
1- She has dilated pupils (and not because it's dark).
2- She licks her lips.
3- She offers you gum or a breath mint on the way home and takes
4- She gazes up at you with her head tilted downwards.
5- She twirls her hair.
6- She sits or stands closer to you than normal (within your personal
area of space (even if you're not touching)).
7- She seems happily fidgety.
8- She starts to giggle.
9- She stalls saying goodbye.
10- You've made arrangements to go out again that she seemed very
11- She looks at you straight in the eye and holds the gaze for
a longer period of time than normal.
12- She looks kind of dreamy and her breathing is more shallow
If you felt that up to this point the date was fairly successful
overall, and you both had fun, your female friend probably enjoyed
herself and wouldn't mind a kiss. It is a good idea to watch for
one or more of the above behaviors to give you a clue as to whether
your assumptions are correct. The best advice we can give is, be
a man - if you want to, just kiss her! What's the worst that can
happen? You want to avoid turning this person into her "new
friend" - a very common occurrence if you chicken out on that
first kiss. Good luck!