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Nice Guys don't finish lastNice Guys Can Finish First

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To determine the root cause of these seemingly bizarre facts we must first examine what it is that comprises the basic personalities of these two distinct groups of males. What is it then that makes these boorish men attractive to women? The answer may be partially found in this negative behaviour itself. The thing about these men that makes "nice guys" cringe is the fact that they seem to have absolutely no idea that they are idiots - in fact they obviously think they're great. These men have no problem asking any woman out - after all, who could refuse them?… they're God's gift to the fairer sex. If they are refused, the woman in question is just a bitch or must be a lesbian in their minds and as a result they just move on to the next, unphased. Despite the fact that "nice guys" feel the confidence exhibited by these "jerks" is unjustified, its existence cannot be denied. This confidence is what many females find attractive and therefore peaks interest in investigating those possessing it further.

A basic tenet of salesmanship is that making a sale is dependent on a transference of beliefs between the two parties involved and that it is extremely difficult to sell a commodity if the salesman doesn't believe in that product in the first place. As the dating game in its initial stages may certainly be likened to a sales pitch, these "jerks" definitely have the upper hand. This aforementioned confidence is evident to females and as a result, they are more predisposed to being "sold" by those exhibiting this trait - after all, if someone is telling you a product is great, aren't you more likely to buy it than its unknown neighbour which sits unadvertised on the shelf? This brings us to the second group of males...

Most of us like to think of ourselves as "nice guys" but for many, this label is more of a curse than the positive trait it should be considered to be. These are the individuals to whom the phrase "you're such a great friend" is anathema. It signifies the fact that the woman who just uttered it, the woman they're interested in dating, isn't interested in them romantically. Does this sound like an oft repeated scene from your life? Why is it that so many men, who respect, admire and treat the object of their desire exceptionally well, time and again find themselves in this predicament? You think you've played your cards right… you've taken things slowly, impressed upon this woman the fact that you're an intelligent, caring, warm human being… and then she turns to you to ask for advice on how to deal with some ignorant behaviour exhibited by her "new boyfriend" who she's obviously crazy about, but just can't seem to get to treat her how she'd like to be. Do you say "dump the jerk and go out with me?" No… that would be too obvious you think - better to undermine their relationship by being an example of what a good man should be. So, you listen to her woes, offer advice and a shoulder to cry on. Does this strategy ever work? NOPE. The fact is, you were probably doomed from the moment she asked you for help. So, why does this happen? There are several reasons but in general they all boil down to one: fear.

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