Common Male Fantasies
Many women are completely perplexed by the sexual fantasies of
men. In fairness, men are probably equally flummoxed by those of
women. Yet, this needn't become problematic, and while you may never
see eye to eye on each other's fantasy, you can attempt to understand
them, and potentially use this knowledge to enhance your sex life.
While sexual fantasy remains a unique aspect of our individuality
and therefore can be vastly different from one person to the next,
a brief tour of any of the thousands of sites and newsgroups on
the "weird wild web" will give you a pretty fair idea
of the sort of things that constitute the common among male sexual
fantasies.
The very preponderance of male-oriented porn sites, as well as videos,
magazines and strip clubs available today offers the first clue
about the inner workings of the hetero male sexual psyche. Without
question, the most common male sexual preoccupation, regardless
of actual content, would fall under the heading of 'variety'. Quite
simply put, men fantasize about other women.
No matter how great the sex is, it is virtually impossible for
men, and indeed women to not fantasize about, or at least wonder
about sex with someone other than their current partners. Behaviorists
and psychologists theorize that the biological imperative to reproduce
our own genes favors men having sex with more than one partner,
and that this tendency may in fact be hard wired into the genes
of men.
Under the general heading of variety there are several subheadings
that constitute common male fantasies. The first is the fantasy
of multiple partners. Many men report a fascination with the idea
of making love to more than one woman at a time. Another quite common
adjustment on the variety theme is the anonymous partner. There
is something about the nameless, mysterious woman who reverses the
stereotypical male role and turns the hunter into the hunted, that
most men find appealing.
It is probably worth mentioning that while these fantasies are common,
indeed virtually uniform among men, they are never the less fantasies,
and as such are seldom actually acted out. Just as we have all fantasized
about launching a stinger missile at the jerk that cuts us off on
the freeway, or adjusting the overbite of some obnoxious authority
figure with our fist, we all accept that these things are generally
best left in the realm of fantasy. Our conscience says, "Gee
it sure would feel nice - but it's just not worth it."
While we can generally categorize all manner of various particular
acts or sexual preferences under the heading of fetishes, there
are several that are commonly enough reported by men as fantasies
to warrant their inclusion here. While too numerous to list in any
comprehensive fashion, they include for example such garden-variety
deviations from good old missionary style sex as, being tied up,
having sex in public places, and rough sex.
Carried further, and acted upon, these sorts of fantasies are defined
as 'deviant', in that they simply deviate from the normal, or statistically
average sexual behavior. While only a certain small percentage of
the population may engage in such activities as bondage, discipline
or sadomasochistic behavior, many men, and women too do fantasize
about these things to some extent.
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